Greetings to all Full Circle friends and members,
In this April edition of our newsletter we have:
April 1st is a time of wild gags and hair-raising stunts: for me it’s also been a time of reading news items that made me wonder why all idiocy cannot be limited by law to one day of the year. Is there an unbridgeable difference between the “April Fool” and that precursor of change and transformation—the Tarot Trump called the Fool?
“There are Fools,” as an old woman I once loved said, “and there are Damned Fools.” The difference is in the intent: it always comes down to the “why?” Perhaps, as April showers fall to bring us the promise of May, we should contemplate whether we go the way of the April Fool or the happy harlequin-clothed youth of the Tarot. Find your personal “why” and step out!
Labrys (who is working towards “old fool”)
Fairies and Tibetans and Poems, Oh My: The richness of spring reading available boggles the mind, from a dark whimsy At the Bottom of the Garden
to My Tibet by the Dalai Lama; then a shattering descent back to earth with a book of poetry from an Iraq veteran in Here, Bullet. If that leaves you needing something softer to land on, Neil Gaiman fans can dive into his journal to see Dada lawyers spreading confusion.
Do It Yourself Again: It’s back in style to be crafty (Wow! We’re trendy?!), and let’s hope this isn’t the middle class response to the “real simple” fad among the rich, as Elizabeth Chin relates with poignancy.
Oscar Shocked? Did anyone expect the party to be Crashed; stereotypes vied for equal time in film this year and we all can benefit from thoughtful viewing. Movie up! Hollywood is even playing with anarchism and rebellion this spring. “V for Vendetta” isn’t towing any party lines, nor fashion lines: check Natalie’s haircut. Now THAT is anarchy!
Pagan shopping
Creepy Crawly Alert: We are not just talking about garden mulch with something extra: hurricane Katrina refuse shredded into bags can bring a bit too much life to your yard. Are your children being “sold” just a bit too hard by a different sort of creep? Have you checked your fine print on credit card bills lately? A federal bankruptcy judge says the new law is good for one thing: allowing creditors to make more money off the backs of debt-ridden consumers.
Terry On: Would Pratchett license the bankers with the Thieves Guild? We know what stamp we’d like to use to mail those bills (muwahahaha!) and we could go clubbing at the Pussycat to rest after shopping, too.
Furry, finny, and feathered folk
Here Kitty, Kitty: More than the fog on little cat feet, an old Norse breed of cat brings the forest, too. Feral cats are a growing issue in many communities. In Berkeley a homeless human cares for these homeless cats with Tibetan chants. Jan Bright, the cat-chanter, must know something about the magic of cats to be such a charmer.
In Black and White: Beloved and beleaguered in Britain, the humble badger, the little insectivore of story and legend; and John Cleese rescues other black and whites: the lemurs he enjoyed in his film “Fierce Animals.”
Black Thumb or Botanist: From seed starting to perennials, here is the Guide, and web forums from gardening to bird watching. Can you forecast your own weather by watching the birds? If your spring seems a bit devoid of live creatures, open the door to more by lending a helping hand to wildlife and investigate green healing zones in cities. Can’t find that bit of bat’s wing for the perfect spell? Here is the secret ‘decoder ring’ to witchy names for favorite garden denizens.
Ah, Spring…Aaaachoo: The B-52s of the insect world, the bumblebees, are out in force hauling pollen. But not fast enough to save the allergy-afflicted. Get the forecast on the chances of seeing this season without red eyes and sneezes. Don’t think staying indoors will save you from the darker secrets of allergy: who knows what evil lurks in moldy corners! Asthma is on the rise, and now another possible trigger is unmasked by research into antibiotic use.
Insured and Safe? Health costs are up and more Americans make choices about whether to get medical care or make the car payment. What stands in the way of a solution is much discussed, is it all just anxiety after all? More than paying the medical bills now causes worry, however; in an age when we microchip our pets, should our doctors be micro chipping us as well?
Choice at Risk in America: It’s no secret America is at war, and the number of injured service-members returning grows daily. Now, in spite of military promises, the ability of those veterans to get medical care is at risk.
Tens of thousands could be denied care as the federal budget gets balanced on their backs. Those not at the mercy of military medical care may have some problems, too, as more states grant medical professionals the right to refuse treatment they disagree with on personal grounds. Who protects the patient’s right to the treatment of their choice?
Toddling into Spring: That magic age when the world is new, and so is walking; toddler-hood. There couldn’t be a more charming time to introduce your child to the spring world, start with this tutorial and go forth to discover.
Slightly older children might enjoy a more fanciful voyage into realms of wonder and magical ideals. If we are leaping ahead of new parents who are still planning nursery space, take a step back to find the perfect name, and chase down a bit of name history while you are at it.
Why Does That Work: Anyone with a three year old has been stuck for an answer on how and why some perfectly ordinary modern convenience works. Now we have someone to bug when we need the answer! There really does seem to be too much information out there. Is that why we keep narrowing down into specialties and jumping to erroneous conclusions and old, outdated solutions?
Shaking an Ocean into Being: Normally rivers, seas, and mountains are born in slow motion. The Afar Triangle near the Horn of Africa is another story. A new ocean is forming there with staggering speed – at least by geological standards. In America, the old ocean is the bigger problem, whether off New Orleans or off quake-prone California.
the Care and Feeding of The Goddess of Liberty
Who Knows What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men: Not just the Shadow, folks. Your telephone company may know and tell all, your e-mail may be searched even if you aren’t a nasty terrorist; even your credit card company is informing the powers to be if you act “suspiciously”. And that CD you popped into the computer to see what your political party wants you to know? When it says “interactive” it means it is collecting data about YOU. The phrase “information age” takes a whole new meaning, and privacy becomes the most endangered species before we know it.
Green from the Ground Up: Building a house no longer need be an environmental disaster. Find the Earth-friendly solution to a home, especially when the engineers are the moms. April showers will bring more than May flowers to some; dirty storm run-off for instance, but rain gardens cut this risk. Even chocolate has been tarnished in ecological and human terms: so here is the good news of the month - ethical chocolate is possible. (Trust your editor; it is more than possible, it is DELECTIBLE!)
Distant Storms: With America, China, and Europe all crying like hungry baby birds for more fuel sources, how is it shaping the rest of the world? Reindeer and gas pipelines are a dichotomy with herders caught in the center in Russia. Beautiful Belize is being drilled for oil; and in the Amazon a neo-colonial oil empire is being marked out, and paid for with little more than the “handful of beads” famous for buying Manhattan. Couldn’t we try a bit of homegrown power?
NO EASY ANSWERS: 4/5/06
My friend Marcus is one of those big German guys; 6’5”, strong, funny, stoic and brilliant, too, a real rocket scientist. No, seriously, he really is a rocket scientist. This is a man whose everyday work means life or death to those in space and so nothing much here on earth really throws him. So, I was surprised when I picked up the phone the other day to hear him sound terribly upset, and barely able to speak. “I’m on my way to the airport, he said, “Lilly’s dying.”
Lilly is, was, forever will be, his older sister. She was diagnosed with a simple and treatable form of cancer last January, had a routine hysterectomy and the usual chemo treatments and yet, she still felt a great deal of discomfort and pain. Then, on her last visit to her doctor she was told (is it only two weeks ago, now?) that “We’re very sorry, it’s everywhere, and you are dying. Go home and make your goodbyes.”
Marcus and I have been friends for a long time and he trusts me, so we talked often via our cell phones while he was away visiting Lilly in hospice. My friends had done this sacred service for me as my own sister lay dying of breast cancer five years ago, and now it was my turn to be there for someone else. Who gets to be more grateful at times like this: the one receiving comfort or the one privileged to offer what little comfort they can? I’m never sure.
Lilly died yesterday at four in the morning, only a few months before her 50th birthday. Marcus and I talked soon afterwards, and we’ll talk again. Dying is like being born: there are serious and often difficult choices to make before, during, and after. Marcus will handle it, I know. He will help his loved ones to get through it, as well. One thing is certain; he and his family will never be the same.
Marcus and I hold very different beliefs about life and death and the meaning of it all, but even so, he has given me permission to perform my own private ritual for the passing of Lilly’s spirit, and he has promised to look out for any messages for her in these next few days, “Just in case”. Of course, he thinks its all religious hooey, but he asked me what I thought, so I told him. I believe that Lilly is fine, now, and well beyond any pain she felt in this life. I also believe our loved ones return in spirit after they die, if only for a little while, just to make sure that everyone they love is OK. I believe that my sister, Aeron, was waiting for Lilly on the other side and that she helped her to cross over, because I asked her to.
You may believe differently. That’s fine by me. Just because you are reading this newsletter, it doesn’t mean that we agree on matters like this, but you heard me out with respect and for that I thank you.
That’s how a civil society works.
If you have ever been there for someone who is dying or someone who is giving birth, or, and this is where our topic takes us today, if you have ever been there for someone who has chosen not to give birth, you know that the issues surrounding life, death and the meaning of it all are not easy, they are never simple and good hearted, reasonable people can see the same issue very differently. That is why Full Circle put this paragraph in our Mission Statement:
We believe in freedom of religion and support the separation of church and state. As a group, therefore, we have no opinion on political issues. At the same time, we urge our members to become informed and active citizens.
We won’t preach at you, especially when it comes to heated issues like civil liberties. What we will do is say to our members, as I said to my friend Marcus, “Pay attention. Something may be happening here that you don’t want to miss, and there may be a message for you in that.”
Right now, something is happening in the way the law treats the sacred realms of life and death. For example:
· In South Dakota a bill is in front of the state senate that would ban all abortions and make no exceptions for either rape or the health of the mother.
· Ohio is considering banning all abortions, except in cases where the mother’s health is at risk, and making it a crime, punishable for up to 10 years in state prison, to transport a woman across state lines to get an abortion elsewhere.
· Tennessee is considering a bill that would ban abortions make it mandatory for a women to notify the father, via what they call “diligent effort”, and through the use a “father registry” before obtaining an abortion to save her life. This new law could conceivably be used to force a women to notify her rapist before obtaining the procedure.
When I read about cases like this, certain questions immediately come to mind, including “How is our “right to choose life or death going to change in the next ten years?”
Good people have argued that it is a women’s right to choose or a individual’s right to die in every single case, and that the state should never interfere with an individual’s choice in these matters. What then, are we to make of the situation in India and in China where women were so desperate to give birth to a boy child, that they aborted girl children by the thousands. This caused such an outrage among feminists and others that the government of India banned all tests to determine the sex of the fetus. Is that a solution? Or did it simply lead to secret tests and abortions among those with money and more cases of female infanticide among the poor?
And what we are we to make of this?
· In Utah it may soon be possible to ban almost all abortions and force the woman to notify the father, even ask for his consent, to save her life even in cases of incest.
No woman I know, and for that matter, no man, likes the idea of abortion, especially after the third trimester. Caring people everywhere would prefer to see far fewer abortions take place, and many would prefer to see better sexual education across the board, better access to birth control, more social services and medical support for care givers around the globe, social systems that support any and all parents who wish to keep or adopt a child, and more care, food and safety for all children once they reach this planet.
We debated these issues hotly in my youth, and that debate continues on today. In fact, it’s heating up again. As Socrates and his friends found, some questions lead to more questions. For example:
Who wants young girls to bear the children of rape or incest and why?
What does ancient history and practice teach us about this issue?
What can we learn from modern history, especially in the cases of genocidal war rapes like those in Croatia and Sarajevo and parts of Africa?
What does it mean for women and world justice that, for the first time, War Crime tribunals have recognized rape as a “crime against humanity” and why is the U.S. government against such courts?
What can an Earthwise perspective teach our children that would further empower them as they face their own choices around life and death?
What does the Terri Schiavo case mean, (not to mention the Oregon suicide law), for “right to die” cases, overall?
How will this new U.S. Supreme Court rule on such issues in future?
While we consider the future and the past, let us also mark what happens now. What do we, as caring, ethical people think about a case of the judge who told the young woman who was gang raped while unconscious that she deserved it? I read stories like this and I wonder;
Where were the parents of these children?
How can we teach young men and women to cherish and protect their precious bodies and those of others?
Why do we so often blame the victims in these cases?
Who is helping her now?
Why were these boys so filled with rage, fear, and hatred that they could do this?
It’s usual to look for blame, become outraged, and rant when we read such stories. It’s understandable, but it changes nothing. When I teach Earthwise practice I tell my students it's easy to be against something but that hard part is to decide what we stand for, and then take action. It is not, (never has been, never will be) Full Circle’s place to tell you what to think. But we can ask you, as I asked Marcus, as I ask myself every day, to pay attention. Something important is happening now. There are messages out there for us, and we don’t want to miss them.
None of these questions I’ve posed are easy questions. They are not supposed to be. Most decisions (the personal sort and the kind handed down by our courts of law) are the ones that change our lives, and these are linked to important issues, like individual rights and responsibilities and these issues all center around power; who has it and why, and how we as individuals ethically use the powers we have. But I’m not telling you anything you didn’t know. We’ve all thought about this; many of us have lived it and made the hard choices or stood by our friends and loved ones while they made life and death decisions. Some choices may be very hard choices indeed, but they are ours to make. For now.
It’s spring time: a time for renewal, a time for change, a time to celebrate life. So why am I being so serious? We have life wisdom, we Pagans, but we have death wisdom, too. Our ancestors knew that no celebration of life could be complete without an understanding of balance and that includes death and change. Well, things are changing, from our culture’s views on global warming to civil liberties to Paganism itself. As Aeron Sorkin says so well, “Decisions are made by those who show up.” Marcus showed up for his family and he helped his sister die. I showed up for him, as people in the past once showed up for me. Somewhere, at some time, someone you love is going to need you to show up for them. Will you be there? What choices will you make? What choices will you be allowed to make?
At some point, we all have to take a stand on issues we care about. That may mean insisting on quality care for a loved one, it may mean voting or it may mean marching in the streets. Many of these issues that directly effect us in future will involve the laws surrounding life and death. It’s your decision as to when, how and why you make such deeply personal choices, and it would be foolish to think that we all agree on what should or could be done, but we can ask that each of you show up, pay attention, and tell the truth. We can remind you that your voice matters. Use it wisely.
Blessings to you and yours in this season of change and renewal.
Sia
We have hundreds of events listed on our California Community Calendar.
These include:
Celebrate Spring in Pagan Style! – Parts I and II
FCE Sponsored Projects.
and
· Apr 2 – Exploring the Mysteries of Sacred Earth – San Francisco
· Apr 7 – Create a Charm for Money & Prosperity – Riverside
· Apr 18 – Design & Create a Magical Dreamcatcher – Riverside
· Apr 21 – Petchitecture (PAWS benefit) – San Francisco
· Apr 29 – Earth Activist Training: 2 Week Intensive – Occidental
· May 7 – Spring into Elderflower – Oakland
· May 7 – Women’s Rites of Spring Festival - Napa
New events are added daily. Click on the Full Circle California Community Calendar to access the list. If you want your event listed, please go to our calendar page and click on the link that says “Submit Event.” The on-line form is simple and very easy to use. Questions? Please contact our Networking Coordinator ScoutGhost at scoutghst@sbcglobal.net.
Dear Full Circle friends,
It’s my job as Council Leader to bring you up to date on what’s happening here at Full Circle. To wit:
I hope this finds you all well and happy. Blessings to you on all your life's journeys. Thanks for the lessons and the memories.
Love,
Sia
And now, the essay you’ve been waiting for….
Essay: First blood, Wise Blood
Rites of Passage and Difficult Decisions
As I write this at the end of February, I know that on March 13th of this year, my menstrual period will end, forever. I first got my period when I was 12; I’m now 52. For 40 years—with the exception of my pregnancy and a few months afterward—I have had a monthly reminder of my gender, one that (unlike many women) I welcomed and delighted in. (Yeah, I know, half the female audience and all of the males are saying “What?!?”) Yes—despite my mother’s own often-dramatic difficulties with her cycle, she somehow gave me a real respect for this monthly gift.
I’ve read about cultures, old ones as well as some more contemporary, that honor the arrival of the wise blood with rites of passage that demonstrate a respect for sacrifice that women have the potential to make, and honor the Goddess in every woman. Yet when I’ve sat in circles and heard women tell their “first blood” stories: so many of them are sad, painful, shaming experiences. I was lucky. I had a celebration.
I remember my mother telling me about “becoming a woman.” We were alone—Daddy was off doing something car-related. Mama had her ubiquitous glass of tea next to her, and something else: a cardboard box decorated festively in pink and white. By this time, I knew where babies came from in great detail thanks to our dachshund, Toby. But now Mom explained simply and clearly what the box was for and why I would need it soon.
She’d sent away for it from the Kimberly-Clark Company. Inside were petite-sized sanitary napkins (no one expected 12-year olds to use tampons back then), a little white elastic belt decorated with pink lace, and a brightly colored booklet of diagrams that made my internal organs look like a cow’s head. Years later I would recall that uterus face and fallopian horns, and understand why we regard the bull as a sacred feminine symbol.
While I fiddled with the contents, Mom told me about monthly cycles and the endometrial lining (although she didn’t use that term). Excitement bloomed inside me. Until now, I’d thought adulthood came over you suddenly, perhaps when you graduated from high school. But now I could see it laid out, a gentle step system of budding bosoms, menstrual periods, public hair, and French kisses, all leading to the ultimate goal: woman.
A few weeks later we saw a movie in my sixth grade class. I say “we” but it was just the girls — the boys were spirited off to see their own movie. (I’ve always wondered what theirs was about: nocturnal emissions? Football?) We girls sat watching our genitalia animate and ovulate. Some girls were absent that day. Later, when I became aware of the big “sex education” controversy—around the time my 16 year-old cousin got pregnant for the second time—I wondered if these girls were kept home by well-meaning but misguided mothers who referred to menstruation as “the curse” and predisposed their daughters to a lifetime of shame and cramps.
After movie day, I would open the bathroom cupboard and look longingly at that box, just sitting there reproaching me every time I reached for the toilet bowl cleaner. I began to push it further and further back. A girl in my class got her period. Another got a bra. I pushed the box out of sight.
Then one day, I was horsing around with Danny Albright when I was supposed to be mowing the lawn. Later, when I went to the bathroom, I saw a bright swatch of pale pink on my white underwear and thought I’d hurt myself wrestling him but then I remembered the box. My mother was thrilled; when my father got home, there were two females smiling like Cheshire cats. “Guess what?” we chimed in unison. Although my father was raised without the salutary benefits of sisters, my mother had obviously given him a crash course in “women stuff.” He stepped gave me a big hug, telling me how proud he was that I was “growing up.”
I got to have anything I wanted for dinner that night, so we feasted on baked potatoes and T-bone steaks, and as the special guest of honor, I got to drink strawberry soda from a real champagne glass. I was on my way to a new adventure …
*****
Now I am on my way to another, one that I chose myself. While I’ve always honored my menstrual cycle, lately it has been a difficult friend. I’ve rarely had cramps or PMS or any of that stuff, but I routinely undergo a level of fluid loss so dramatic that when I finally mentioned it to an advice nurse, she insisted I drive immediately to the hospital for a blood test to make certain I wasn’t risking an electrolyte-imbalanced heart attack. Yikes!
Because it’s always a bit dramatic, I never questioned it … but in the past few years, things have gotten out of hand. I’m anemic no matter how much iron I take, I’m on medications that help but cause their own problems, and I spend several days a month tucked up at home because I’m too lightheaded to be trusted behind the wheel. There are various ways to handle this problem (called menorrhagia) ranging from the drastic—hysterectomy—to the fluids and Meclofenamate strategy I’ve been trying with limited success for 3+ years. I’m tired of hives, stomachaches, sleepless nights, cabin fever, and the physiological drama of losing as much as 5 pounds in a matter of 6 or 8 hours. And hey, did I mention that I was 52? I already have my toes over the edge of the menopausal diving board anyway …
HTA—hydrothermal ablation—will quiet the cells of my uterus while leaving my hormones (what little there is of them!) alone. It will allow me to cycle with the moon without the concomitant high tides. It’s comparatively low intervention, not particularly dangerous, and virtually assured to change things for the better. Choosing it was neat, logical and the right thing to do. It was also very, very sad.
Now, I really appreciate nice, tidy black-and-white decisions: do you want ice cream or a poke in the eye with a sharp stick? (Easy one, huh?) And, though I hate them, I know how to navigate situations that essentially have no options—sort of black-and-black decisions—like: do you want to pay your taxes or go to jail? (Hate both choices, but it’s still clear which one I should select.) The hard ones for me (and I suspect, for everyone) are the gray ones: choices where both options have upsides and downsides and there’s no really clear path. I pray at my altar for some type of guidance, something clear and obvious (Oh please Goddess!). I keep a journal. I meditate. I trance. I talk walks. Of course, the answer is right in front of me, if I’m willing to look at it: accept the gray.
Despite my love of extremes, my comfort with the blacks-and-whites of life, in truth, much of our existence is played out in shades of gray. Hard choices. Painful choices. Tradeoffs and triage and ambiguity. My job here, in this body, is to get used to that, to take life on its own terms. And truly, if you look hard enough, even the most wonderful opportunities have a small hidden cost; even great losses often clean out a space for something new to grow. It’s like the yin/yang symbol, each color with a dot of the other in it.
Sometimes you gain a bit and lose a bit. Sometimes you gain a lot and lose a lot: all in the same moment. On March 13, I will gain energy, health, and freedom, all worth having. I will also lose a small but treasured part of my life. Another rite of passage: another blood ritual. That I can embrace all the colors in this situation, that I can honor all my feelings about my decision, the relief and grief carried side-by-side, feels like rich, wise blood flowing through me.
SnakeMoon
Broken Links? Please report any broken links or errors to info@fullcircleevents.org
FCE Newsletter Staff:
Labrys is the Editor-in-Chief of the Full Circle Newsletter. She can be reached for comment at Labrys6@mac.com.
Sia is the Publisher of the Full Circle Newsletter and the Council Leader for Full Circle Events. She can be reached at info@fullcircleevents.org.
Charlynn is our Copyeditor & Grammar Witch. Thank you, Charlynn!
ScoutGhost is the Networking Coordinator for Full Circle Events. She can be reached at scoutghst@sbcglobal.net.
Snakemoon is the Senior Writer of the Full Circle Newsletter. She can be reached at snakemoon@comcast.net.